Monday, June 16, 2014

Kate Also Bakes Cookies!

Before I get down to business, can anyone tell me why I have "Everybody (Backstreet's Back)" stuck in my head? I mean, I don't really is a catchy little diddy that takes me back to my youth while also putting a pep in my step. And can we just talk about how dreamy Kevin Richardson and Nick Carter STILL are to this day? I seriously know how to pick my celebrity crushes. I just had to get that off my chest, and I hope for the remainder of your duration reading this entry, you're singing this song in your head too, remembering that BSB > 'N Sync. Moving right along...while I did bake this past week, I did not bake cakes; obviously, I went a different route.
Om nom, nom, cookies! For another great song to get stuck in your head,
Youtube "Om nom, nom, babies." You won't regret it. Promise.
I baked D a batch of extra large M&M chocolate chip cookies and another batch of equally massive Andes mint chocolate chip cookies. I know you probably noticed that extra space on my parchment paper there...I promise the remaining two cookies were in the oven. I mean, I did have to eat one of each just to make sure they didn't taste horrible. But I did this long before the photos occurred. These cookies are massive, but they should also withstand shipping all the way overseas, and not just because my former time spent with FedEx taught me so, so many things (like, yes, people do ask if they can ship human remains. I mean, really??!). These cookies have a secret ingredient to keep them super soft and chewy on the inside:
Hint: The secret ingredient isn't the brown sugar...
It's the Jello! Vanilla instant pudding and pie filling to be exact. Add a 3.4 ounce package in your favorite, everyday (most likely Nestle Toll House) cookie recipe, and walla- cookies that stay so chewy you'll think its magic. Or something like that. But really delish either way. I'm sure the extra butter love doesn't hurt things either. You'll also want to adjust the size of the cookie dough scoops so that these bad boys have a proper amount of chunk to them (I went with 1/4 C):
Also, if you're OCD and Type A like me, you'll go the extra mile
and put more M&M's on top of the cookie so they look pretty.
So the Andes mint cookies aren't as pretty, but they taste so much better
that you almost don't even notice. On account of how fast you'll eat them.
 The other thing you wanna do to make these cookies even freakin' better is to chill your shaped dough in the fridge for at least two hours. I left mine overnight. Don't make the same mistake I did though and cook your dinner AFTER you've already inhaled several spoonfuls of cookie dough. You know, to make sure the integrity of said cookies are going to be wonderful enough for your husband to eat. That's what I'm going with...I mean, my tuna cakes were really good, but after the tongue tastes the dough, little else will ever satisfy it. And by tuna cakes, I mean crab cakes but with tuna. Because there's no such thing as fresh crab meat out here. If there was, I think I'd question everything about life.
It just looks so...healthy.
The next day, I begrudgingly ate salad for lunch in attempt to keep from going full inner fat kid on my body. I cooked my dough at 350 for 17 minutes. The original recipe said 11, but since my oven is more temperamental than a tantrum-throwing toddler, absolutely no melting had occurred after 11 minutes. I'm not sure if it was the parchment paper I use to keep the bottom of my cookies from burning or what, but I required six more minutes to gooey perfection. The outsides were golden brown, and the insides still slightly doughy. I think for cookie baking (I tried, no good mash up of the words "cookie" and "baking" can be made), I need a Silpat liner. If I happen to have any rich benefactors reading my blog, I promise to try to class things up around here a bit if you send me one. Mostly because my birthday falls right after Christmas, and I have no other time to ask for  something as trivial as a Silpat liner. First world problems, ya know? But either way, I highly recommend this recipe. I mean, don't you just want one of these so badly???
Heaven on my counter tops, but a lifetime on the hips.
When shipping overseas (or even regular destinations since the USPS seems to take its precious time), it is helpful to add a piece of bread into a freezer bag with your cookies before boxing them up in an airtight Tupperware plied with plenty of Saran wrap to create a cushion. This way the bread gets stale instead of your cookies. I, however, was of course out of bread, and instead used hamburger buns. I'm sure that is going to be all sorts of confusing for my poor husband when he gets them. "Am I supposed to make a sandwich with these or has my wife clearly lost her damn mind?" A little of both, sweetie...a little of both. Til next time, my fellow eaters!

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