Sunday, November 22, 2015

Do the Dip

We live in a world where a lot of people disagree just for the sake of disagreeing. I believe that one of the only things everyone can truly agree on is that chips and dip are the perfect precursor to just about any meal. That's why we all fill up on a ridiculous amount of chips and salsa every time we go to a Mexican restaurant. It's why we stay near the snack table at every bbq to eat the host out of house and chip. We eat chips and dip with reckless abandon because hey, a few chips can't hurt, right? It's only until you demolish the whole bag and hate yourself a little that it's a problem. So this got me thinking...if people love chips and dip so much, would they love cookies and dessert dip, too? Could it be possible to bookend a meal with dips? Could I start a dessert revolution? Pure madness! So naturally, I had to try because I'm a crazy person who knows absolutely no limit when it comes to finding new ways to fill my body with a borderline stupid amount of sugar. If you cut me open, blood would not pour out...but chocolate cake might. Yesterday I prepared to attend a party and set my plans for dessert domination in play. Meet my dessert dips, and revel in my glory (I may or may not have delusions of grandeur, but I still think I'm pretty awesome either way).
When I dip, you dip, we dip.
Heellllooooo my pretties. Did you know Jello makes a cheesecake pudding? Because I did not, and it has officially changed my life. I was able to put together a turtle cheesecake dip centered solely around it, and for that the wonderful people of Jello will forever be in my good graces. The other cute little dish (literally, look at how cute my bowls are) is a toffee cookie dough dip. It is both a mouthful to say and eat! So how well did these dips go over at the party? I was told that these dips were some "Nobel Prize level stuff." Suffice it to say, everyone you know will love you twice as much if you bring one of these desserts to your Thanksgiving festivities. And this is also one of those wonderfully fortuitous moments when the dessert both looks and tastes insanely impressive but is amazingly easy to throw together.
Case in point.
The turtle cheesecake dip shall open your world to endless possibilities. Could it achieve world peace? It's a distinct possibility. No one can argue over a good dip. So gather up:
  • 1 box of Jello cheesecake pudding
  • 1 8 oz. container of Cool Whip
  • 1 8 oz. brick of room temp cream cheese (use the full fatty fat fat kind, or the dip will be weird and not the right consistency)
  • 1/3 cup of powdered sugar
  • Chopped pecans
  • Caramel sauce
  • Chocolate sauce (I used Hershey's chocolate spread)
Start by creaming together the powdered sugar, Cool Whip, pudding mix, and cream cheese. Once well blended, add in your desired amount of pecans. I used half of a small bag and saved the rest for topping.
Put that amazingness into a medium-sized bowl. Smooth it out with a spatula. Revel in your greatness.
Then eat a little of the chocolate sauce before you start to pipe it on your dip.
Then add a nice layer of caramel sauce. Feel free to eat some of that, too. Caramel is delicious.
And finish your layering with another pass of chocolate sauce.
Top with remaining crushed pecans and place in fridge to set!
That's it. You're done. This will take ten minutes of your life from start to finish, and people will praise your name for an entire party. Totally worth it. This was definitely the crowd favorite, but I am not a fan of nuts in food. I will eat every cashew, pecan, or peanut you can find me, just not if it's encased in another food. Nuts do not belong in brownies, can we all just finally come to terms with that? I want to bite into a warm, gooey brownie without fear that a crunchy nut is going to ruin the experience for me (this is also another reason why I bake--I call the brownie shots!). Since I am opposed to nutty foods, I also made the toffee cookie dough dip so I could enjoy dessert, too. If you're an anti-nut nut (see what I did there), this is the dip for you.
Not a nut in sight!
Can we talk about how underrated Heath bars and toffee are? Bless the soul who thought to mix butter and sugar together at a high heat. We need more innovators like that. For this dip, gather up:
  • 1 8 oz. block of room temp cream cheese
  • 1/2 cup of room temp butter
  • 2 teaspoons of vanilla
  • 3 heaping tablespoons of brown sugar
  • 1 cup of powdered sugar
  • 1 cup of chocolate chips
  • 1 cup of toffee bits
Hold on tight, people, this recipe is a wild ride, too. Mix together the cream cheese and butter until nice and fluffy. Then add in the vanilla, both sugars, and mix well. Finish up by adding in the chips and bits (new idea: open cookie store named chips and bits). 
Place into a medium-sized bowl. Smooth it out with a spatula. Continue to revel in greatness.
You could leave it at that, but I like to make everything pretty, so I topped my dip with some extra chocolate chips before placing in the fridge to set.
Yet another ten minutes of time for a night of ooh's and aah's directed your way. Even if you suck at baking, this is foolproof. And man alive, is it worth it. Each of these dips has something to offer. So much so that I have permanently placed these on the dessert rotation list, for sure. I will be dreaming of eating the minimal leftovers after we finish off the pumpkin cheesecake from last week. I have way too much dessert in this house. Not that it's a problem for anything other than my waistline, really. And this year we're not going on a cruise in the middle of December that I have to stay in super shape for, so I get to bust out stretchy pants and make the problem go away. Speaking of stretchy pants, I hope everyone has a fantastic Thanksgiving full of fried turkeys (the only way to eat turkey) and family. Don't fry your family though...draw the line at cannibalism, always. Good old Kate Bakes Cakes will be taking a Kate Bakes Break until mid December due to traveling and the end of the semester (so. much. grading.), so I will see you all back then with some delicious Christmas treats when the timing is finally appropriate for Christmas-themed posts. Because unlike everyone else in the world, I remembered that after Halloween there was another holiday before Christmas...looking at you, Hobby Lobby. 'Til next time, my fellow eaters!
I bid you a-dip.

No comments:

Post a Comment

Leave me some love, some advice, tell me the meaning of life...whatever you fancy! You don't have to have a Blogger account, you can leave a comment by clicking "Anonymous" in the "Comment As" box..but if you're not a troll, leave me your name after your comment so I know who said what!