|Did you just gag a little? Then my work here is done.|
There were points during the decorating of these cupcakes where I was cackling with witchy glee and then just full on evil laughing once finished. Strangely enough, my evil laugh and my regular laugh are strikingly similar. It shouldn't be too hard to transition into my evil laugh full-time after I've completed world domination, so that's a plus. I am still taking applications for minions and underlings, however. I did cheat some (what evil genius doesn't?) and just made these cupcakes from a box mix using the cake-jacking method of adding in an extra egg, using butter instead of oil and doubling the amount, and using milk in place of water. I was more focused on the creation of repulsive decoration and less on taste. Can you blame me? Duncan Hines has had my back too many times to turn away now. Never forget where you came from!
|But I suppose I can't be that evil if I'm sharing my trade secrets.|
|Naturally I had Halloween cupcake papers on hand. I couldn't call myself a Halloween enthusiast if I didn't.|
Once baking my cupcakes according to package directions, I let them cool off on a cooling rack in the fridge because I was extremely impatient...but not before ogling how perfectly domed and sized they all were. I am super horrible at getting my cupcakes to all be the same size and not extremely large or way too tiny. Goldilocks would hate me. Somehow this recipe that was supposed to make 24 cupcakes only made 21. I guess I had to sacrifice three cupcakes in order to get 21 perfect ones. Worth it!
|You know what really sucks? Trying to fill a squeeze bottle with jelly. My kitchen is permanently coated in raspberry jelly now.|
|Filling is a sinch! Sink the tip of the squeeze bottle into the cupcake and fill to your heart's content.|
|I applied moderate pressure to the squeeze bottle and once the filling was noticeably spilling out the top, stopped.|
About 3/4's of a jar of raspberry jam will fill 21 cupcakes. Save the remaining jelly for later. Phase two of reaching evil baking genius has been completed. Now, on to phase three and making of the frosting!
|You noticed the vodka in the background, didn't you, you sly little minx? You're also not surprised at all, are you?|
- Two sticks (1 cup) of softened butter
- Six cups of powdered sugar
- One tablespoon of vanilla
- One teaspoon of almond extract
- Three-four tablespoons of milk or heavy cream
- Brown, red, and black gel dye
|And you, too, can feel like your very own Dr. Frankenstein. POWER!!!|
|A field of brains. Knowledge is power (and yummy), after all.|
You could call it a day here and have boring gray brains for dessert, but I felt as though the grossness factor was a mere four without making stuff even bloodier. I was also testing out my skills as a creator here, you know, so if the zombie apocalypse ever happens, I'm able to trick the undead into eating my cupcake brains instead of my actual brains because they just look that good. Plus a zombie full of cupcakes is going to be a lot easier to run away from. These are the things I pontificate about (had I been born with less of an active imagination, I may be solving global warming or the bacon shortage or something important. Eh.).
|Yes, now we've achieved 8.5 on the grossness scale.|
|Even when it's oozing blood.|
|Brains in surplus...I could've become one rich lady if the Wizard of Oz Scarecrow was real.|