|It has been too long, cake.|
|I do so love it when there are scraps.|
|Dammit Spongebob, not now.|
- Take about one large spatula full of frosting while it is still white, and set aside in a small container and keep covered
- Take about a cup of frosting while it is still white, and set aside in a medium container. Dye this portion of frosting blue for the minion's coveralls; keep covered.
- With the remaining frosting, dye it all yellow. Use this frosting to crumb coat the ENTIRE cake, as cutting off the sides will cause major crumbage if you don't; keep the rest covered so it doesn't get hard to spread while you wait for your crumb coat to set.
|Real talk: I had to hide these cookies from myself so I wouldn't eat them all.|
|Looking at this, if they make giant Oreos, that would suffice...but I really love those Pepperidge Farm cookies.|
|You need Tootsie Rolls and either silver sanding sugar or silver color mist.|
|Press all of your rolls together, and crack a crude joke involving toilet humor or Mr. Hanky from Southpark.|
|Then roll them out to form a long, skinny rope. I just rolled them between my palms.|
|Once your rope is formed, take your eyeball out of the fridge so you can see how big of a circle you need to form, and then press those ends together when you've got your sizing correct..don't forget to put the eye back in the fridge!|
|Then spray with the color mist! This stuff really doesn't smell edible, but let's face it, I'm sure Tootsie Pops without edible color mist will still give you cancer.|
If you want to use sanding sugar instead, you need to get the circle damp and roll in the sugar. But what a waste of sanding sugar!!
|I see all!! Including your thumb...|
Set aside the goggle to dry, and remove the eye from the fridge again. Smooth it out using the paper towel trick, and put an upside down Kiss into the frosting so you have a pupil. Now that your crumb coat is dry, get that cake back out!
|Using the small spatula, carve a line into the bottom of the cake where you will separate the minion from his coveralls.|
|As you can see, I didn't make things incredibly smooth because I was worried about the evil color wheel blending my primary colors together to create a lame secondary color.|
|But no worries! As you can see above, this is precisely what the paper towel trick is for!! Smooth like buttah.|
Once you've frosted your entire minion, put it in the fridge or freezer again for a decent amount of time. I gave it the equivalent of lunch and half an episode of Grey's Anatomy..it was the one where Denny dies, so I got lost in a box of Kleenex and wasn't watching the clock. Then take out your cake and smooth it out using the paper towel trick; add your eyeball and your goggles any time after this. You will have some blue and yellow unevenness after smoothing, but don't worry, I will show you how to fix that with some piping.
|I could totally eat a tub of this with my giant cookies and be content for days.|
|A minion without a mouth is slightly terrifying.|
|Kevin, you give great side eye.|
|It's so cute, I'm gonna die!|
|I mean, just *LOOK* at Kevin. The candles made it even better!|
|And then Derek set him on fire.|
|And I gleefully reveled in my stretchy cake pants that I was about to get some dessert.|